Do not think about gratitude by doing good

Once I was introduced to a man who was burning with indignation. I was warned that he must be talking about the cause of his condition after 15 minutes after we exchanged greetings. And so it happened. Indeed, my new acquaintance was completely absorbed by what had happened to him 11 months ago, and could neither think nor talk about anything else.

You probably assume that it will be about a terrible tragic history? Well, listen, this man has paid his staff Christmas bonus of 10,000 dollars. Everyone - and there was 5 - was thus approximately $ 2000, and no one benefited not thanked the chief. This fact and the grindstone of his thoughts and feelings for almost a year.

Angry man - Confucius said, - always full of poison. My companion was so poisoned that I am heartily sorry for him. He was about sixty years. If we believe the insurance companies that we have numbers that each of us live on earth a little more than two-thirds of the difference between our age and 80 years, then that person under favorable circumstances remained live approximately I0 or 15 years. However, he has already spent a year out of his allotted time at the outrage at the event, which is long gone. I really was filled with compassion for him. Instead of angry and revel in self-pity, he should think, why his act was not widely appreciated. Maybe he underpaid his staff and forced them to work harder than normal? Maybe they did not consider the Christmas bonus as a gift and thought it deserved its earnings? Maybe he was too strict and arrogant, so that no one dared, and dared not express my gratitude? Maybe subordinates explained issuing awards that a large portion of their income spent on taxes?

Of course, on the other hand, it is likely that the subordinates were selfish, mean and rude people. Maybe so, but perhaps differently. I know this is not bigger than you. I agree with Samuel Johnson, who said: "Gratitude - the result of a high level of moral development of man." But I am sure that the human nature to look realistic. Ingratitude is natural, like weeds, thanks - like a rose. It needs to cultivate, nurture and protect. I can cite thousands of examples of people waiting in vain for a well-deserved thanks. And I think it is unlikely that anything will change in the course of your life. So why not be realistic and do not agree with one of the wisest men that ever ruled the Roman Empire, the famous philosopher Marcus Aurelius. Once he wrote in his diary: "Today I met people who talk too much. They are selfish and ungrateful. But I'm not surprised and not worried. I can not imagine a world without such people." Reasonable, is not it? If we are always grumbling that someone did not appreciate our good deed, from this, nothing will change. So do not expect gratitude. If we do not get it, do not grieve, but if someone accidentally thank you, let it be a wonderful surprise.

It is natural for people to forget about gratitude. The only way to earn the love in this world - do not demand it, and do good, not counting on appreciation. That's what my parents. Despite the poverty and constant debt, they always managed to send money to an orphanage in the Bluffs. They did it for many years, every year, but never visited the house. Only occasionally a mother and father received letters from children. But they were richly rewarded, as the joy experienced in assisting those who needed it, not wanting or waiting for a response of gratitude.

I am sure that my father was the ideal man matched the description made by Aristotle - the man earned the right to happiness. "The perfect man - said to Aristotle - is experiencing the joy of what takes care to others, but he was ashamed to accept kindness from others. The sublime nature to do good, the lower nature take it."

And now I want to formulate a rule of thumb: if you seek to find happiness, stop thinking about gratitude or ingratitude, and try to experience the joy of doing good.