How to identify your strengths
Deadhead to shape important skill to have to imagine other people. Developing this ability, it is desirable to use everything than have. This ability to play musical instruments, and the ability to tell funny stories or jokes, and possession of information on major international and political events, news from the world of show business, etc. With this in mind, you need to read books, newspapers, listen to news, attend exhibitions, film premieres. If all that you have no desire and mood, we should arm methods of self-regulation. We suggest you to raise the self-worth individual to use the "Declaration of self-worth, which with various modifications used by many authors.
Contents
"I am - it is I. This (this) as I never was and never will be. There are some people something similar to me, but exactly the (a), as I have not. I own my voice: quiet or loud, soft or sharp. I own my mouth and all the words that he says: good or unfair. I belong to my eyes and all the images that they can see. It is. This is sufficient reason to love yourself and become interested in them. Of course, there is something in me that causes my bewilderment. But now I can make useful to me became more and more. Means, I have everything to live. I - it is I, I - it's great. "
It is recommended daily to read aloud his declaration of self-worth when this will be a need. Milquetoast is very important to raise self-esteem, learn to appreciate themselves. Researchers found that low self-esteem is adjacent to the marked shyness, and that shyness recedes with increasing self-esteem. F. Zimbardo offers a milquetoast prodelyvat exercise "resistance forces". The essence of this exercise are as follows: on the left side of the paper write a list of weaknesses, and then on the right side of the same worksheet - the opposite of quality. For example:
Weaknesses:
"I never have time to"
Objection:
"What I do is perform a very thorough and good faith"
Continue in that vein. Should be held as much as possible examples. About me try to think as it is written on the right side of the sheet. We give below a few exercises from the arsenal F. Zimbardo, who can help raise self-esteem a shy person.
"Put them on the hot seat"
Make a list of all the people who call in you shyness or depress you. Then take two chairs and set them against each other. Sit on one of them and imagine that the first person on your list is sitting across from you. Talk to him pokrichite at him, accusing him of all his problems. Then change the chair and answer the way, according to your idea, would be in your partner.
"If only I was not shy ..."
Make yourself comfortable and close your eyes. Think about a person or situation that is constantly causing you to a sense of shyness. Think about this in detail - every word, every gesture. Now imagine that you would have done in the same situation, if we were not shy. What you would need to be done? Say? What would happen? Think of this positive version of each day during the week. The next time you start to feel self-conscious in such a situation, call in the memory of your positive image. Actively train yourself in this way.
"You know that you love me?"
Choose a friend you trust and who trusts you. Let each of you make a list of other features that you really like (make sure to make a list of ten points). Tell each other why you have these qualities. Begin with the words: "Why I really love about you ...." What do you feel when your friend tells you compliments? Learn to accept compliments (say "thanks", if nothing more to say) and dive into the positive emotions that are caused by compliments. Learn how to pay compliments to your friend open. Use it every day and tell people compliments, even for a little ordinary things.
"A collage of force"
Each of us can make at least one thing better than anyone else. This may be preparing some dishes, the ability to listen to the interlocutor, to associate fashionable thing, etc. What can you do best? Much you can do well? Assemble the stack of newspapers and magazines. Cut titles, pictures, cartoons, etc. - anything that illustrates your strengths. Make a collage of them. Hang your collage in mind.
"Self-esteem - a model of the game"
Think of someone whom you admire. This can be a friend, filmstar, the character of the book, show business or politics. Imagine a situation where your character is experiencing shyness. What is he doing? Says? How can you help him? What is the strength of your character? Make a list. If you had a choice of all these strengths, what would you prefer?
What is the impact to these strengths to your shyness? Close your eyes and imagine yourself in a few situations where you do not feel shy. In order to positively perceive the world, you must have a positive self-esteem. Already indicated that self-esteem milquetoast understated. In order to determine its strengths offer to answer the following questions:
Exercise " How to identify your strengths . "
1. What I like about me, it's ...
2. What others like about me, it's ...
3. What am I good at, so it ...
4. Recently, I got great ...
5. When I was in shock, I ...
6. I am glad that I can ...
7. Those who know me know that I can ...
8. I recently made a compliment about the fact that ...
9. Principle, which I always follow ...
10. An example of my concern for others is that ...
11. People can count on me ...
12. They say I have a well turned out, when ...
13. This year I have better than in the past, turns out ...
14. I managed to overcome ...
15. A good example of my ability to organize all of life is that ...
16. I have all the great results when ...
17. Goal to which I now aspire to ...
18. Recently, I managed to resist the temptation ...
19. I was pleasantly surprised when ...
20. I think I have enough brains to ...
21. If I had to single out some their best features, I'd say ...
22. I have been able successfully to control their emotions, because ...
23. I can be totally relied upon in that ...
24. In the next two months, I have to do one important thing ...
Take a blank sheet of paper, divide in half. The left side of the sheet, list their own shortcomings. Within 10 min. Write down all your negative qualities. There may be 3, and 20. All strictly individually. Then try every negative quality translate into a positive and burn on the right side. Every disadvantage in some situations it becomes worth more. Every quality of a person does not have any negative or positive sign, it is the people themselves "hung" for them their grades, depending on the situations in which they fall.
For example:
1. Temper - vitality. Typically, hot-tempered people are having a choleric temperament. They are able to quickly solve problems, often gregarious and open.
2. Incredulity - experience and depth. People become suspicious if they are in their lives were very open. Such people often organize "verification" of their partner. If you come to the conclusion that he can be trusted, then, as a rule, this trust becomes a truly deep and safe.
3. Hypochondria - a subtlety, sensitivity. People are suspicious - people are sensitive. In business negotiations, such people often are excellent observers, who will not miss any detail. They have well developed intuition, and they are faster than others feel insecure.
Need to align their own self-esteem. If you get the same positive and negative number, the exercise was successful.
