Kids solutions

Sometimes only your desire - to shut down somewhere in a quiet room with soft perinkoy and rest there in solitude, peace and tranquility. Home life is like the front line.

-Mom! Ah-ah-ah! I do not want to sleep, I want a cartoon!

Ho-ro-sho - and muttering to himself "I will not be, I want do not want to" catch myself thinking that go along the path of least resistance. Nobody asks what you want, and force you to leave the thin stream, making a tired weak-willed woman. You have to submit to the autopilot requirements. And so day after day, you lose the status of the leader, and be kicked around all and sundry. From the visitor mom to a three-year daughter, decisive, as she live, what is and what to do today. But you were not so delights of motherhood!

Raise a child. And now comes the moment when the baby becomes able to make a decision. For someone - this is a joyful moment because of the possibility to withdraw from his part of responsibility, but for someone this point is very disturbing: "How can a toddler something to solve?". One way or another child sooner or later in life to be somewhat independent. Passed by way of the family is changing, the question arises: to follow the decision of a child, walking him on a leash, or ignore its decisions by suppressing the initiative, insisting on his adult life position. New relationships are associated with the first conflict between adults and children, but do not forget that first and foremost task of parents to teach - a small child to make sound decisions, once the baby felt like an adult.

Children have very different motivations, different goals than in adults. The main driving force - emotional desires: "I want to play, I want to eat chocolate." If you think about it - a lot of baby-making would be a disaster if fulfilled. On the way to kindergarten'm talking to a three-year old son: Bringing baby to obschesemeynomu case:

-We are with the Pope today will choose me a new car. What you prefer: black or white?

-Recycle! - Firmly says son .- Buy garbage trucks! - Quite seriously, he advises, referring to the smelly monster the size of a small country house.

-Oh, she's so big, as I'll call in the parking lot? - I refuse such an offer.

"Well then" gazelle "! At least a "gazelle"! - Pleadingly asks the son.

Children's solutions do not meet the coordinates of fact, they lie in the range of emotions. Children's motivation is in the realm of the senses, not focusing on comfort, practicality, intelligence. Growing up, children are motivated decisions are changing, and I doubt that in twenty years, the boy prefers garbage trucks fashionable cars. Often, however, and decisions of adults born of a desire for pleasure, the satisfaction of immediate desires. Therefore, parents should teach children to reason, to make informed decisions, look to the future by analyzing the correctness of the decision.

To avoid conflicts in the family and "dragging blankets on yourself first rather negotiate with a child - all decisions should be" older "(ie true). If a child decides he must justify it: "I do not want to go to kindergarten because feel bad." If a child can not justify its decision, it is not an "adult" and therefore entitled to a decision goes to the parent. The advantage of such relations in the fact that the baby opens its grounds to help us parents to control the situation in his little world: "I will not go to kindergarten, because my teacher punishes" or "going to watch a cartoon for a long time because I'm afraid to sleep in the dark. "

Reason with your child, help him gain confidence when he takes a reasonable solution: "I have dirty hands, I'll go wash before dinner, and try to find the secret of his motivation, when the baby makes questionable decisions like:" Do not worry, Mom, I'll I come from a kindergarten. " As an example, to reason with your child about the reasons for their decisions: one for breakfast would be porridge, because of its added strength, "" Toys should be removed from the floor, so no one came and broke. " Of course, the temptation to push authority and simply say: "Eat your porridge, I said!" But consider that the solution to feed the baby cereal will look just as your desire, and children need to hear the arguments, to be able to understand the essence, then, and his solutions too will be suspended and not give you a hassle.