Marriage - a test of strength

During the years of marriage to learn everything: and fall in love, and leave on time, and tolerated, and even to quarrel. Wise people have long discovered that marriage - is a test of strength . Just do it, like everything else, it is desirable competently. Imposing a partner with unusual or unpleasant it may cause the role of not only conflict but also open-air lobby of hostility. And usually begins with an innocent desire to do it the way draws the imagination of the ideal. A desire to "remake" the partner, and this desire may arise from the best intentions: "He will also be better." But the effect of such action is rarely positive. They grow to a normal fight "for power" or "freedom." Of course, the constant arguments and fights do not show that your marriage is harmonious. And often it is a rhetorical question, "Who's the Boss?"

Delayed start of hostilities. As a result, such as "MMA" resentful feeling both spouses. So whose the same chance to become head of the family above - men or women? Sufficiently intense struggle for the leadership role - often a direct path to divorce. But in this struggle, the chances of men and women are roughly equal. In favor of men testify traditionally patriarchal society, and self-confidence, more peculiar to men. Men often try to "put his wife on the spot." Moreover, there is an inverse relationship between strong-willed qualities of this man and his desire is to suppress a woman, sometimes with violence. Attempts to destroy a woman as an individual in an age of emancipation seem to be nonsense. Meanwhile, in Russia the problem of violence against women in the family did not lose sharpness. Probably, not only in Russia. According to studies, violence in one form or another is present in every fourth family. According to the media,

"In Russia each year at the hands of their husbands are killed around 15 thousand Russians. However, views of men and women about what constitutes violence, diverge significantly: according to opinion polls, 81% women and only one-third of men think that physical violence in families is common. Intimidation, insults, beatings - that's something that women in Russian families are traditionally and with sad regularity. Often to blame for the conflict, both spouses (inciting violence by women recognize the frequent half of men and women), but the victim as a result, as a rule, it is women, and in any case they are almost always vulnerable to the arbitrariness of their husbands. Police in such matters, until someone someone does not kill you, prefers not to intervene, but from neighbors and friends in the best case you can only expect sympathy.

What to do if you husband is trying to "break"

Try to explain to him that YOU the same person, and are entitled to respect. It does not help if the case had gone so far. It remains to be protected by law. But our women are reluctant to do so because attracting husband accountable for disorderly conduct, she often gets the imaginary benefit of being away for a brawler, but quite significant penalty inflicts a serious blow to family budgets, and the offender after returning home, probably not just a "betrayal", and women are afraid of such returns.

So sad but true - should think twice, as in the case of hopelessness to decide on more significant measures - to pass the examination and not to ask her husband to let go, and leave it in the walls of the treasury for a longer period, if the violence is intolerable. A better - get a divorce if there is a place to live without being harassed. With all the imperfections of the existing laws to bring her husband had lost all sense of proportion to the liability is still possible, though it must be taken care of at least witnessed his actions and conduct of the examination.

The women also have their advantages, which are also actively exploited emancipated lady. This is sex, lack of which in principle can be blackmailed. Money, too, led by his wife, as a person who is engaged in solving everyday problems, and if it does, and she earns money, the authority of her husband has been steadily declining. The child is also traditionally more attached to his mother, and often this fact serves as a lever of pressure on her husband. And in case of divorce, as a rule, the child remains with her mother while the father is able to pay alimony. Women know this, and often divorce serves as an element of blackmail, although not every man can be blackmailed in this way. But many husbands agree to lead women completely voluntary. They do not want any responsibility, and "under the thumb" feel comfortable enough. Only by winning this battle, will you be happier?