Today in our society, large family - the exception rather than the rule, whereas a century ago in the families, mostly living his own farm, were born one after another, many children. Personalizing a child's upbringing in such conditions was practically absent. Clothes handed down from older to younger, toys craftsmen from wood, and life skills training occurred during care in seniors. Nature and weather conditions were a reference pastime. People lived in a confined space. Information from person to person transferred under the settlement, the almighty king was uncertain distant personality, the church had no effect on the kids with the same force with which the subordinated adults. The sole authority in this limited world of small children were their own parents.

What happened in the twentieth century? child has personality! For him and for him alone purchased goods from the convenience of diapers to furniture. Flow of information around on all sides! Already a year in the field of view kid is a lot of authority: from mom, dad to Stepashko, Santa Claus, Luntik, Barbie and superrobota on batteries. Rhythmic change of seasons has special significance today, and chaotic life of a child varies in accordance with parents' employment and social factors. What child today? Independent! Adult! Saucy! And yet very friendly. The kid in our society - a whole new person, a child of the modern era. Child time in the rapidly changing face of society. He does not just follow the hem of her mother's skirt, he, he noted with diapers, he winner of the first steps.

Difficult children

Difficult children ...

This term is firmly stuck to the Losers in the schools of our childhood. Now, when sung personal freedom, almost every self-confident child can easily be called difficult. Children recaptures of adults for all the new and the new space, sometimes calling into question our credibility and experience. Of resentment we call them hard.

"She leads him to a psychologist, and a kindergarten on the method of" Montessori "but he, like mine, falling to the pavement and pulls his feet when naughty - I'm complaining girlfriend.

-And you pereshagni - advises my friend, read a lot of psychological literature .- My mom told me that when I was little and fell into hysterics, she's just stepped and went on. I immediately calmed down! From the perspective of psychology, it shows that you do not care, which is equal to the lack of response that is required to prove. The child gets up and goes for you ... - let it in reasoning.

I had had enough. When I got home, I will soon present an opportunity to show the child that I was indifferent to his empty hysterics. After the proposal to go to the grocery store a little son fell in the hallway on the floor with cries of: "I do not want, do not go with you anywhere." I calmly stepped over him and went up the stairs, showing the seriousness of their intentions. He continued to lie and yell. I went back and stepped back. Then again. No special effects, promised a familiar-a psychologist, did not happen. In the end, I dragged him on his hands to his car, and only when clipped to a belt child seat in the back seat of the car, he calmed down, realizing that victory is already behind me, and totally calm voice, brushing away a tear capricious, and asked:

-Where are we going?

In-store, at home there is nothing.

-Buy a toy? "- He immediately began to fight for their new franchise!

Probably, when you expect the child's birth, is already thinking that the baby will be aimed to conquer the world. Perhaps, in that moment when you realize that inside of you was born a new life, think that the kid is aimed to conquer the world. It just assumes that you will not be the last of his ally. Or even a good tool in the fight for a place under the sun.

But many parents treat their children with due respect, suppressing their every desire something to defend. Worrying about their own unshakable authority, they are nipped in the bud in all their children healthy ambitions. And the older these children themselves feel more comfortable in the role of a slave, not master. Give your child a chance to practice on you (of course, within reasonable limits), and he will learn to resist others' influence. Well, if his life will be surrounded by nothing but good people. And if he would be in bad company? Dully habituated to obey the will of the authority, he would never be able to defend their interests.

The reasons for such apparent change in the behavior of many children are seen in changing social conditions. Sharply increased the population in urban areas. Changed the nature of information flows, and now even a child of three can be seen in the news, the situation with forest fires and hear about the growth of oil prices on the London Stock Exchange. Children learn numbers on car plates and watch as the planes in different directions cross the sky. It is we, the naive, thinking that they do not understand, carefully tying a scarf over her coat, while a baby gathering in its three years old group, figure out how many sweets are taken to suffice until the evening, and what cars he had did not wear this week. Yes, in a pocket to put all this not to found a teacher and did not see Jora.

Every parent wants their child to the leader. That he became such, it is necessary to answer many of his questions, to live with him during infancy, childhood and adolescence and, more importantly, do not try to substitute his notions about the world their own. Sure, you complements the knowledge and experience of each other. But most likely, it's your child will surprise you in twenty years, new developments, and not you him. Changing times, changing characters. Kids are already unusually gentle obedience. Child became a personality! Is it bad? No, of course! The main thing that we, parents, properly belonged to the kid's desire to conquer this cruel, cruel world.