Romance - an integral part of each of first love. Without it, do not happen the first meeting. The romantic aura, which every lover Teen gives the object of his love, gives all the relations of particular charm. But when a romantic flair shatter, it is important that relatives were able to hold it and explain to your child that dreams - this is one thing, but real people - both. To disappointment did not become a tragedy for your son or daughter, it is better to try to explain to him that people do not have to conform to our ideas about them. They have the right to change. Resent them for it - is foolish and counterproductive.

If love is real, we must try to take a loved one for what it is, and if the adoption is impossible, it is better to leave, but again, nice - no quarrels and recriminations. It is better to stay friends. Many teenagers start dating with the opposite sex "just because" everybody already been dating, but I have not. " Our parental duty - to explain the suffering delirium that if he has no desire to meet with anyone, it does not necessarily follow the example of their peers. Lack of emotional attachment in early adolescence did not indicate that the teenager "is not so." Just his time has not come.

But if all the time has come, you should have patience, calmness and tolerance. Do not try to force to tear off his son or daughter from the "useless objects". If it's just infatuation, fascination, then it itself will take place. And if this was serious, that your child can only be angry with you and do everything in spite, spite. Intemperate in the emotions of teenagers simply poured on your head all your thoughts about your methods of parenting will tell you about their "tender" feelings for you and go into the night, slamming the door. Quieter children may withdraw, ceases to participate in general conversation, quietly away in his life, so much so that you will notice when it becomes too late.

Equality and partnership - these are the principles on which you must now build our relations in the family. Children grew up, acknowledge them as equals, they become friends, companions, counselors. Favorite (favorite) your child - this is a topic about which we can say only good things or nothing at all. Neglect is not allowed, as well as offensive comments. If the gap should occur, it will come, but let the initiative comes not from you - the child himself can understand their feelings, your parent's business to tell him that you are always on his side, no matter what happens. Your love for him indestructible, and do not depend on any external factors, whether even the deluge. Teenager needs to be utterly sure of this, know that if anything it has a place where you can relax and heal the wounds, even if they happen.

And if my first love has gone so far that there's nowhere? And if teens have already had everything? What can we do, their parents? Yes, in fact, nothing can and do. Late. Do not scold - this fundamental rule. Swearing not carry any constructive information. It is done, now we must try to avoid unpleasant consequences for a teenager. And an unwanted pregnancy - the lesser of two evils. Do not forget about AIDS, hepatitis of various kinds, other STDs (sexually transmitted infections). We often shy, or simply afraid to talk with children about this. And it is absolutely vain, I must say. It is best if the child has received their first knowledge of the parents than on the street from friends who have the same approximate knowledge about sex, like himself.

Speak with your child! Tell him about your experience, of course, in those terms that do not shock him and did not inspire him to misconceptions about the relationship of the sexes. Of course, getting the first theoretical knowledge, a teenager wish to check virtually all of what he learned. This is quite natural. The main thing - that his first intimate experience was positive and did not bring him disappointment and has led to a cynical attitude toward sex.

Literature, especially fiction, social consciousness inoculate us an idea of sex as an unearthly bliss, something so that brings untold pleasure and joy. Often this is true. But we should not forget that for beginners, and especially girls, the first contact - always a shock. Almost never the first intimate experience does not bring joy and fun girl, and then they almost always regret for what he did. In addition, we are so trained, that all the consequences of imprudent sexual relations rests on the shoulders of girls and their families. Unfair, but that is our reality. Therefore, it is a girl must take seriously to take action. So what makes girls, girls make such an adult and demanding full accountability act?

Firstly, it can be done from an elementary fear of losing her lover. The guy says: "Come on, not what I would find myself another, more accommodating ..." and she agrees. He can still throw it, and after the first time and she searches for love again and again agrees to intimacy. Bad way, unpromising. She has every chance of becoming lonely forever, because it obviously makes it clear the man-hunter that she is interested in him, and men such behavior often produces the opposite effect.

Sometimes girls go at it in order not to become an outcast, a black sheep in their group. All have tried, and I have no need to rush, but not both, and will remain a spinster - they think, and rush into the arms of anyone who so desires. Certainly, the opposing team is extremely difficult, but try to keep your child grow self-sufficient and not to succumb to someone else, is not always beneficial. Teach your child first in such matters declared in the first place their personal interests and desires. Teach a girl firmly say NO if the proposal does not fit her.

Often a teenager in this way proves to adults, and especially himself, that he has grown up. I'm big, I had sex - they say about themselves. Sometimes the teenager goes to the intimate contact in order to annoy his parents - mom says you can not, and I still do it. Generally speaking, than the earlier age of partners who have a love affair, the less often the cause of intimate contact are really tender feelings. Curiosity, a desire not to lag behind others, coercion, moral or physical, is anything but not love. It is we adults realize that without a close intimacy with your partner sex becomes fizzaryadku does not bring any satisfaction or even basic satisfaction.

And we should explain to their children that only love can cause a merge of bodies, souls and lives. This is especially important in the first experiment, your child because no return, no replay everything again will be impossible. When we throw, we suffer. When the first love of the collapse of the ends - it's a disaster for the delicate teenage psyche. A teenager suffers the question - why? Some are looking for reasons in themselves, others blame the wrong or incorrect, but everyone suffers.

And this is not necessarily suffering an abandoned girl. The young man who searches for love, but finds sex - not less tragic story, really. Subsequently, this may lead to the fact that he can neither express nor differentiate one from another.

What do the suffering soul? How to cope with the pain? Stay close to your child. Help him get through it this hard moment. Sympathize, empathize, be on his side. Tell me how it was you, and bring to his mind the thought - time heals. Everything passes, and it will be. Only in Brazilian soap operas love lasts for twenty years, has not disappeared. In memory of our life is highly variable, we forget everything, even things that seem to never forget. Let this be a pain for him is not a tragedy, but an invaluable experience, science for the future.