The rules of etiquette in the home and family
From a letter to a young woman: "I write not because I do not know what to do, but rather, because he did not know with whom to share. At 35 my second marriage, which I'm happy, except for one small problem. Its essence lies in the fact that my second husband treats our home as a place where you can maintain yourself, without sticking to the rules of cultural behavior, indeed, in his opinion, he relaxes.
As for me, for me it is obligatory to tidy appearance as in-house and outside it. That is a rule I learned from a previous marriage. I consider it my duty to go out to breakfast with a laid hair and makeup, and her husband, on the contrary, scolds me for it, claiming that he was pleased when I was in a bathrobe and curlers on her head. I think that by allowing yourself to relax at home, to retreat from the rules of etiquette, we rolled down the slope .... "
Where the interests?
First of all, the letter did not indicate that it is not like a woman in this marriage. Either it can not overcome their stereotypes and dressed in curlers and dressing gown, or she is looking for support in the face of the magazine, which advises her husband to go to the kitchen in a jogging suit. Maybe the whole thing in another, and the woman could not understand why such a different attitude, and her husband's home "dress code"?
Without a doubt, coming home, each of us wants a break from the conventions of the outside world, to stay them. The desire to wear a shapeless robe after strictly a business suit - this is one of such manifestations. Option to postpone the case until a later time at home, at work if it is absolutely unacceptable, it is also a form of psychological relief. It was home, we look forward to a full understanding of and-pass, regardless of appearance and conformity to established rules in society. A man comes home from work and takes off all the masks, while remaining itself. It was here that he is charged with energy and fueled by love.
Without a doubt, a comfortable coexistence of people in society implies the observance of certain rules of conduct that are so eager to break, well at least at home ... If this does not happen, where people can relax, then what will it mean for him a house?
Of course, it's great when women seek to remain charming and attractive and at the stove, but this does not mean that you should use a ton of polish and mountains makeup to look good. A man wants to see next to a woman in her natural beauty, without any women's tricks and embellishments, because it is so you and he loves. He tries to create for you an atmosphere of calm and comfort, where you can relax and be yourself.
If you believe in your man and yourself, it does not matter whether you are in full parade or in a cozy dressing gown. If you feel attractive without makeup and "hair", then stay home as natural.
Without a doubt, in every family there are certain traditions and rules. For some families can not imagine dinner without starched napkins and candles, while others feel comfortable in your pajamas and furry slippers. It is important that this situation is suitable for all family members.
Having some experience in the past, marriage, maybe you should not use it in a new, because men are different and their attitude towards life and women are different. What was acceptable in the past, union, will not necessarily be acceptable in this case. It is not necessary to ascribe the blame to the divorce itself, digging and searching for the circumstances that could lead to rupture of relations. Do not project past relationships with new ones, try to build something new, if u do, then the new error. Do not let past experiences influence the present.
Another factor that affects the construction of the house rules of etiquette, is the experience handed down from the family of the parents. But we all - adults, we can analyze what is acceptable in our family life, and that should be left in children's memories. Discuss this with my husband and create their own rules, which will exist in your family. Try to consider the wishes of all family members, because it is important that each house was nice and comfortable.
It is very important to honestly determine for yourself what you yourself mean by the term "relax at home." Is the desire to be always "in the parade" to your personal desires or habits developed over the years on the advice of one of the publications. You must determine not whether hiding behind this problem, some other, more serious, which simply inconvenient to talk.
