You do not just have probably heard the phrase: " All of us from childhood . " If you're accused of something you are accustomed to blame. If you're frightened by something, you are accustomed to fear. However, this fact was before, why do you continue to do it now? Do the circumstances of your life have not changed? What happens if you stop doing what used to be done? Many say: I am, because I was so done. How many years ago was that? If you beat a kid and you've come to expect from the impact of parents, why do you expect the impact on other people? Are all people in the world have the same structure as your parents? If you believe in it, probably you have reason to remain the same person you were a child. If not - it's time to admit that old habits are not relevant to this moment of your life. Of course, we do not choose their parents, we do not choose the conditions under which we will have to be born. But no one commits us as adults to remain in the same conditions.

There are many different reasons that compel us to remain the same as what we are born (what we have brought up).

Reason 1. Belief that change the initial conditions can not be

Of this folk and art wisdom has invented a lot of sayings, such as: "A fool is born, a fool is never cured," or "Born to crawl, can not fly" (or "Born to crawl, fly in its beak). These phrases say about those people who are content just because they were given initially, and who do not seek to expand their capabilities and experience. After all, who the "fool"? This is not a man, depleted intelligence, and the person who does not use his experience, there comes a lot of time on the same rake, that is not focusing on the environment, to life's circumstances. If a person is too lazy to search or seize the opportunities offered by his life, this belief becomes an excuse.

We can say: "Why do something if still can not change the original?" Sometimes you think when the conviction is a family, generic and, therefore, very important and valuable. For example, for any reason, parents should not have been successful, and they can tell their children that to succeed in this social environment is simply impossible. At the same time, history is replete with examples where success is sought people who were born in a poor environment, initial conditions are used as a springboard to a better push off and accelerate. And that lack of money pushed them to seek a better life.

Reason 2. Fear of change

A person may seek to remain in the same conditions because of fear of something new. Indeed, because of these conditions, he already knows everything. And about what might happen, he does not know anything. Thus, a person with a little prosperity does not know anything about how to be rich and unhappy man knows nothing about what to live a happy person. Sometimes, in order to become happy, you want to give up what makes life unhappy, and this can already heavily used. For example, in order to break the cycle of poor relations, they have to change, and this may lead to conflicts and sometimes rupture.

Reason 3. Loyalty to self

Some people believe that the change yourself or change the life - is change itself that is worthy of respect only to the person who for a long time to hold his loyalty. Fidelity to its principles and trust their decisions really are worthy of respect, but this is only true in the case where it does not stop to grow and make life orderly and happy. Adopted once the decision may eventually become outdated and cause you damage, do you unhappy. In this case it is useful to "change" decision, rather than keep him faithful.

Say, buying stuff that does not fit the material well-being, can temporarily raise a person a sense of value, but strongly and permanently damage its financial position and result in even further reduce his confidence. When we talk about life, destiny, personal way, then such decisions may be unprofitable relationship with someone else or, conversely, the decision not to deal with anyone no relations, ideas about themselves, about the world, about other people. Sometimes, to be happy, have to "change themselves".

Our feelings - a system of orientation in the world. In the movie "The Secret" therapists, trainers, physics, metaphysics, psychologists say that the need to rely on the senses. And we agree with them. Positive feelings are telling us: "Well, what do you do - well, just keep on doing." Negative feelings are telling us: "Oh, you were in the wrong place and you do not. Go away and stop doing what you're doing. " Let's say you're used to load the care beyond measure, and suffer greatly from this, very tired. Your tired and your suffering are telling you: "Stop! Do only the bare minimum, otherwise you will fall apart. " And if you do not listen to them, do not stop, you suffer even more. Then, most likely, you start to blame for their misery loved ones: are they not doing its part, is they make you suffer.

But this is not true. The only thing is that you take on too much. How did you learn not to stop, do not trust other concerns, beyond measure to control the way others do what you instructed them - it is a question to your childhood. What makes you not hear your feelings now - it's a question for the fact that you have something to lose if you listen to the senses. What could it be? Most people in the world too are responsible in relation to other people's lives and not responsible for their own lives. Their way of life is distorted: they are trying to change other people, manage them, but do not want to govern themselves and take responsibility for what they do with themselves!

We create our own lives - not other people. Consciously or not, we relinquish freedom and responsibility for their actions, for how to construct our lives. We ourselves remain where we badly. We ourselves have put up with the fact that we really did not fit. We do agree to be those who want to see the surrounding. We abide by the views themselves. And since we ourselves are doing, then we ourselves can not do this or do other things. It needs only one thing: to know exactly what we want. Sometimes our desires are hidden under a pile of other people.